With my recent Bible study on 1st and 2nd Samuel, I am confused as to why God seemed to have dismissed of many men in the Bible having multiple wives and concubines. I guess it’s not infidelity if you are also married to another? But they are not married to the concubines. I was just seeking further knowledge and understanding of why God chose to punish David for Bathsheba and not the other acts.
I don't know that I would say that God dismisses the men having multiple wives in the Old Testament. Remember, in this series we've been learning about the two sides of God's justice. The retributive side does have a "getting what you deserve" angle to it. And not one of the stories in the Bible of men with multiple wives is without serious consequences. The children of the various women are almost always at odds with one another. Jealousy, conflict, even murder are common occurrences among these family stories.
Also, we were looking at just one moment in David's life where he experienced consequences for his sin of adultery. If we were to look at other stories, say 2 Samuel 6, we would see David experience the consequence of not following God's instructions for how to move the Ark. Regardless of the sin, there are always consequences. And God never dismisses our disobedience. He forgives us of our sin when we ask, but He never dismisses our sin.
How do I support and encourage my dear friend well? A Jesus follower... in her first year of marriage.. spouse addicted to porn and masturbation... and just so very broken. With a marriage that she feels is falling apart.
Obviously, this is a heartbreaking situation. First, don't underestimate praying for your friend and her husband. Second, if they both are followers of Jesus and attend Gateway, recommend meeting with a pastor for marriage counseling. Finally, if there's resistance from him, this book (which I haven't read) may be of help to her.